All posts by phwakawaka


Friday, May 13, 2022

Global Rights strongly condemns the murder of Ms. Deborah Samuel, a student of Shehu Shagari College of Education, Sokoto, by students of the same institution over alleged blasphemy. We are utterly appalled by the brazen posting and subsequent distribution of a video recording of the inhumane episode across multiple social media platforms.

Our thoughts and prayers go to the family and friends of the deceased in this difficult time.
This deeply disturbing action calls for a reflection on the state of affairs in Nigeria. It is an indictment on law enforcement and all arms of government when religious fundamentalists do not just confidently kill innocents despite the presence of police and security but have the audacity to film such a criminal act, post it online, and proudly admit their involvement. It is a testament to the failure of the state to put in place effective laws and implement them.

We call on the Nigerian Police Force, the Nigerian judiciary, and the state and federal government to ensure that all those involved in the mobbing and lynching of Ms. Deborah Samuel are apprehended and made to face the full wrath of the law. We remind the Nigerian government that this trend in Northern Nigeria has only continued because past victims and the families of victims have not gotten any justice while perpetrators are further emboldened by state-enabled impunity.

Without a doubt, the pattern of the government’s acquiescence to similar crimes through its complacent enablement of impunity has clearly been established. We remind the government and people of Nigeria of Shuaibu Yohanna, a Pastor killed on the 22nd of September 2021, in Kano state; Bridget Patience Agbahime, a 74-year-old street vendor of Christian faith, beaten to death on the 2nd of June 2022, in Kano state, by an angry mob allegedly for blasphemy, and Methodus Chimaije Emmanuel, a 24-year-old street vendor who was killed in a similar pattern on the 29th of May 2016, in Niger state, also after being accused of blasphemy.

We reiterate our call to the Sokoto state government, the federal government and the Nigerian security agencies to bring to bear the full force of the state’s justice system on the killers of Ms. Deborah Samuel and ensure their prosecution to the full extent of the law. Nigerians must unify in demanding justice for Ms. Deborah Samuel and demand an end to endemic state-enabled impunity for crimes committed under the guise of religion.
We urge the government at all levels to take tangible and urgent steps towards fulfilling their constitutional mandate of ensuring the security and welfare of all citizens and protecting the right to life, freedom of thought, and religion by demonstrating political will to end religiously motivated, and other forms of lynching and the practice of jungle justice in dealing with actual and perceived crimes in Nigeria.

The rule of law must prevail in Nigeria, and the Constitution must be respected as the grundnorm. Citizens must therefore desist from taking laws into their own hands and delivering their own brands of justice. The government must act and act fast!

Abiodun Baiyewu
Executive Director



CBN Gov. Emefiele Godwin

+234 (0) 708 778 4788

+234 (908) 333 1633

+234 (811) 666 5321

+234 (703) 411 8266

Wednesday, May 11, 2022

For Immediate Release

Emefiele’s Dishonesty, N100m Forms, other Distractions and the Leaders Nigeria Needs

Civil society organisations and citizens leading the advocacy for openness, accountability and effective governance in Nigeria, have called on Nigerians to stay focused on demanding the quality of leadership Nigeria requires in the 21st century to leverage its human and natural resources.

As is typical in an election season, various political players are indulging in tactics that are inconsistent with democratic values. The high cost of nomination forms, unknown form buyers, media disinformation and other political gimmicks are some ways politicians, especially the governing party, are distracting citizens from focusing on the key issues of governance and leadership that Nigeria needs at this time. At the minimum, Nigeria deserves a leader with:

  1. A strong commitment and respect for the rule of law and judicial integrity.
  2. An understanding of and respect for the separation of powers – legislative, executive and judiciary.
  3. The ability to uphold the Nigerian 1999 Constitution (as amended) for equity and justice.
  4. A development drive in the direction of preserving the dignity of Nigerian citizens.

The collective stated that it is important to remind Nigerians of these critical issues in light of the decision by Godwin Emefiele, Governor of the Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN), to contest for the office of president. The CBN Act (2007) was written to protect the CBN from external political interference, not expecting that the interference could be internal at the highest level.

Mr Emefiele joined the All Progressives Congress (APC) in February 2021 and it is significant to note that neither his party members led by the President of Nigeria, Muhammadu Buhari, thought this was contrary to the spirit and the letter of his terms of engagement as CBN Governor. It is also instructive that Mr President and the Presidency have not issued a statement on this unfolding drama.

If there is any doubt to the implied and expected neutrality of the CBN, Nigerians should be reminded that the materials for our elections are kept in CBN offices across the country and the Nigerian Security Printing and Minting Plc (an agency of the CBN) prints some of our election materials.

Separation of powers is at the heart of any democracy, and it is for this reason that by our laws, the CBN Governor can not be appointed or removed at will by the executive arm of government. In addition, for the same reason, two-thirds of the Senate, not a simple majority, is required for the Governor’s removal by the legislative arm. Therefore, the breach of this principle by Godwin Emefiele should not stand.

We remain resolute in our stance: Godwin Emefiele’s political ambition hinders the independent decision-making his role requires, and therefore a liability to the credibility of the Central Bank, Independent National Electoral Commission (INEC) and our electoral process. He should therefore resign immediately to pursue his partisan interests or the National Assembly should commence the process to terminate his appointment.

Nigerians can lend their voice to this call by signing the petition here:

Seun Onigbinde, BudgIT
Auwal Rafsanjani, Civil Society Legislative Advocacy Centre (CISLAC)
Atinuke Odukoya, Centre for Women’s Health and Information
Ngozi Iwere, Community Life Project (CLP)
Joshua Olufemi, Dataphyte
‘Yemi Adamolekun, EiE Nigeria
Ayodeji Fadugba, Kili Ceramics
Ier Jonathan-Ichaver, Sesor Empowerment Foundation
Princess Hamman-Obels, The Electoral Hub
Abiola Akiyode-Afolabi, Women Advocates Research and Documentation Centre (WARDC)
Ayisha Osori


Mr. Patrick Uduma (Convener)

“The Superior Man” 02 -05 – 2022 @ The Arena Event Center, 37 Tombia Street, New G.R.A, Phase 2, Port Harcourt.
Inside Man was birthed from the place of Mr. Patrick Uduma’s desire to celebrate his birthday with Men and identify the common struggles of Men to form a platform that helps Men to share their individual experiences in order to encourage and inspire and create a doable action that we all can benefit from.
To re-awaken and foster the co-creation of a quality Man.
Re-parent, identify, own and express the Man in you.
Clarity, Wealth, Health, Network.
I am the Superior Man. My Life’s lens is grounded in goodness that conditions my thought life superintending my believe life, ensuring a distinctive attitude in joy which produces excellent character required to manifest my intended life.
Purpose Discovery– (Patrick Uduma)
Entrepreneurs/Business- (Uche Onochie)
Relationship– (Kenny Ajibade)
Health- (Okoro Stephen)
Leadership and Governance- (Osinachi Nwandem)
Finance- (Kingsley Chukwujindu)
The conference was moderated by Chinedu The Oracle and Jude Omabebe. of Nigeria Info Radio Port Harcourt.

Cross-Section of Attendees

OPENING REMARKS BY MR. PATRICK UDUMA: In his words, “I am so excited to be here, for the fact that is my birthday and I am celebrating it with Men!”. This Birthday is dedicated to Men..To be a Man in Nigeria, is a battered experience. Gone through tough times, as a Man, trek miles to go to school. Nobody will believe you to share your truth. Raised in the mud, but no longer in the mud, now in the midst of Marbles. Good-evening Superior Men, it is my pleasure to welcome all Men into the “INSIDE MAN”. The essence, is to proffer solutions across Men’s struggles. The INSIDE MAN CONFERENCE was awakened to foster and cheer a quality Man. Over four (4) years, building quality Men.
We are here to re-define Success, because Success is not about Money. Men will be awakened and get back their strength. We are going to change certain belief system that are not delivery, we will evaluate such systems. Intentionally, avoid the following Four (4) things:

  1. Fault Finding: Each time, we see something to complain, it destroys our intent.
  2. Blaming: We blame our Parents and our Leaders for everything that goes wrong.
  3. Complaining and Judging: If you are a Man here, you need an instructor. “Your progress is rooted on Instruction”. Are you doing Life, or Life is doing you? When you argue so much, Life is doing well and the reverse is also true.
  4. “Your personal power has nothing to do with your person”: One of the signs of Great Men and Superior Men are Compassion and Empathy.

Things that can change you for good:

  1. How a Man See: Your thought life is how you interact and connect.
  2. Dwell in Goodness: That’s Mr. Patrick’s Belief System and that has changed how he does life. You can adopt yours…
  3. We are Men with Community/Commitment.
  4. Honesty; Value the time of others.

Men are struggling: It’s an honour to Celebrate Men. “When you don’t succeed, you are irresponsible”. -Men are not used to crying- I have come as a voice of encouragement to tell you to go again.
What is Business?
What is Entrepreneurship?
Who is an Entrepreneur?
It takes a lot to do business and get it right. 90% of Start-Ups fail in the first 5 years, because of ignorance among others.
A Business is a “going-concern” for profit or non-profit. Business is an entity.
Entrepreneurship is the creation/extraction of value. The process of setting up a Business. You must have respect for your Business as a Personality of its own, otherwise, it will disrespect you.
An Entrepreneur is an individual who creates a new business; He bears the risks and enjoy the rewards that comes afterward.
Entrepreneurship is the oldest profession. The greatest tool an Entrepreneur needs is the gift of “Observation”. Understanding that there is a need or a problem to solve. Entrepreneurs are problem solvers. You invent, because there is a problem. If you don’t have an idea that is solving societal problem, don’t jump into business.
Three Things Needed to Serve:
a) Service Delivery: The risk comes from translating that idea into reality. Business is the vehicle that you need to bring those ideas to reality. Most of the Fortune 500 Companies started during recession…Microsoft etc. In Nigeria, we are in recession, this is the best time for Start-Ups to employ disruptive ideas to gain the Market-place. “When you see a Man that is Successful, you see a Man that has risked it all”. “Until you are ready to lose it all, you will not be able to gain it all”. Start a Business, young people, this is your time to explore. “Business is not an Assumption”. “Build your Business as if you want to sell it”.
b) Start building Locally, but focus Globally.
c) Build Systems that works: Get the right people in your Business. Don’t go and engage your brothers. Nobody kills Businesses like brothers. Begin to build systems and earn in Dollars ($). Earn in Dollars, no matter how small. There is a Blessing on the go.
Leadership and Governance, each time its discussed, we look at corruption. The solutions to Leadership and Governance starts with us, not the Politicians. Business issues like; Corruption, Lack of Accountability, Integrity Issues.
Why do we discuss Leadership and Governance in an all-Men Conference? Governance are structures that enables Leadership. Governance is the Motto that drives Leadership. Leadership and Governance are geared by “Influence”. A Leader with “Influence” is able to change people’s thoughts, belief’s etc. Influence can be positive or negative, it is determined by the results.
Traits of Positive Influence:
Accountability, Transparency, Goodwill; where you exude positive influence, you gain “value”. “A Leaders influence is dependent on his persona”.
Six (6) Posers for Success in Life/Business/Career:
a) Your “Mission”?
b) Do you have a “Vision”?
c) What are your “Values”?
d) Do you have the “Right People”?
e) How is your “Environment”?
f) How is your “Culture”?
Some inputs:
“No system survives without an ideology”…. Uche Onochie
“Your environment is in you, until you want to say No”…. Uche Onochie
John Maxwell said: “Leadership is Influence”, what then is Influence? Influence is Service.. Mr. Patrick Uduma.
“You don’t earn reputation by force, because reputation is outside of you”.. Mr. Patrick Uduma.
“Influence means nurturing relationship”… Barr. Osinachi Nwandem.
Okon-Calabar, is from the East, he knew exactly what he wanted, but have no resources to accomplish his dreams. When he got matured, and his Master was about to die, Okon-Calabar told him, he has part of the family all his life and can manage his Master’s resources and eventually became the Manager.
Lesson from the Story: “If you have an idea, you can produce it through somebody and nurture it through”. Mr. Patrick Uduma.
Uche Onochie’s thought on idea development: “Your idea has to go through a process. The process of writing. Anything you don’t write, dies out naturally. Write your ideas properly, it will help you know if it’s investment friendly and ready. Successful/Busy people do not have much time for spare”.
Teach yourself how to write a Business Plan for an Investor…. Uche Onochie.
“You need to build network…Wealth are built from that network”… Uche Onochie
“You have to intentionally build loyalty, even among your peers”…. Mr. Patrick Uduma.
Sharing risks means Partnership.
Saxophonist and then the mind blowing Combophonist.
“I want you to treat yourself, the way you treat your car”. The reason is this, because the average life-span of a Nigerian is shortened daily and it’s about 50years. “The Man spends his youth pursuing Wealth and when hie is old, he spends his Wealth on his Health”.
Health is not the mere absent of disease, but a state of physical, mental and social mental well-being. Every human-being is made up of body, soul and spirit.
Wellness: it refers to the optimal physical ability to achieve your plans.
Well-being: Has a more holistic aspect. It comprises so many aspects of the being. There are so many departments of the body, that helps it to function very well. Career health, financial health etc, all needs your attention.
Self-Care: The ability to take care of yourself and this is the key to curb untimely death.
Preventive Health: Take yourself to hospital when you are still strong, not otherwise.

“Whoever says, Money cannot buy Happiness, do not know where to go shopping”.
“We don’t have Wealthy Men in Nigeria; we have Rich Men”. Therefore, there are no Role Models in Nigeria.
There are Fundamental differences between Wealth and Riches?
“Wealth add value to Society”. “Riches destroys”.
Few Thoughts:

The Convener with some Crew Members
  1. Money is ignorant. Money is neutral.
  2. Life is not just about Money. Life is about Purpose. Life is about Fulfilment.
  3. Money is a Tool: and should be used in the service of Life. Money is just a Means. Relationship is Capital.
  4. At the Core of the Quest for Money, is the Concept of Power.
  5. You will either use Money or Money will use you.
  6. Few Thoughts on Finance:
  7. Earn and Spend (It’s what most people know about Money).
  8. The Concepts of Finance: Creation of Wealth, Savings. No matter what you are paid, you can’t make your way to finance. For you to walk into your Financial Paradise, your one stream income will have turn to four/multiple streams of income.
    Finance is creation, savings and investment and you need some discipline to make it happen. The Fundamental difference between Wealth and Riches is “Knowledge”.
    The Power of Wealth: Ideation, Hard work, Wisdom, and Network to get Wealth.
    “There is no Prayer-Point for Money, Money is an Action-Point”. God does not add, He multiplies (In Money-Factor).
    “Pray like you don’t work and work like you don’t Pray”.
    Norman Vincent Pearl said: “Empty Pocket never held anyone back, empty head does”.
    “Don’t Pay for Experience, it’s too Expensive, instead Lease Experience”.
    “There is value in Failure…When you fail, you are guided, but when you become Successful, you become a Coach”.
    Few Thoughts:
    “Wealthy people invest, Poor people consume”.
    Every Money that comes to you should be a seed.
    “Investment starts with Knowledge”. “The Greatest Investment you can make is SERVICE”.
    We live in a century, where we don’t talk about Financial Capital again, but Relationship Capital.
    One of the most important skills, we need is “People’s Skill”.
    Do people think of you as an Asset or Liability? Life boils down to relationship. Know how to build and relate to people.
    “When you relate to people, be your BEST”. “It’s not Gift that makes People, is Relationships”. “Where you rise from, determines where you rise with”.
    64% of the quality of Life is attached to your Home. “If she doesn’t Celebrate you, look for someone who does”. MARRY YOUR FRIEND! “Be very intentional about LOVE”.
    “One of the Greatest Wealth is RELATIONSHIP”. “ANGER is not wrong, but it is the mis-management of anger that is wrong”. “Be very intentional about your Relationship, Blind Love is killing people”.
    “Without Vision, Purpose is Useless”. Pst. Kingsley Chukwujindu
    Save 20% of what you earn. Pst. Kingsley Chukwujindu
    In every Successful relationship, there is mutuality. Pst. Kenny Ajibade
    Marriage is not about satisfying me; it is about meeting each other’s needs. Pst. Kenny Ajibade.
    Love is Value. Without Mutuality, there is no Love. Self-Control is a rare virtue. Pst. Kenny Ajibade.
    Social well-being: Your ability to maintain healthy relationship. Live a Socially balance Life. Dr. Stephen Okoro.
    “Treat your In-Laws according to how you will treat your Parents”. Have a Budget Circle for your In-Laws.
    Mr. Patrick Uduma (The Convener), thanked everyone for being part of THE INSIDE MAN CONFERENCE and Awards where given to the Speakers.

MERCY WEDS SMITH (23rd April, 2022)

Mr and Mrs Smith Nwokocha Receiving Marriage Certificate.

Saturday, April 23, 2022. It was a special day for Miss Mercy Eberechi Eze and Mr. Smith Chinenye Nwokocha as they joyfully declared their consent before God and His Church to enter into Marriage.
The Couple made their intention known to the witnesses during their Holy Matrimony held at Corpus Christi Cathedral, Port Harcourt, to accept each other as husband and wife for the rest of their life.

The Couple: Mr and Mrs Smith Nwokocha

In his Homily at the nuptial Mass, Rev. Fr. Innocent Johnsantus reminded Christians that Marriage is an institution ordained by God, a beautiful thing, a covenant and not a contract. Fr. Johnsantus called on the couple to centre their Marriage on “Love and tolerance”. “Make your Marriage work, nurture your love for each other. Beauty fades, wealth ease out, but Love last forever”, he said. He enjoined them to uphold good communication and companionship. “Procreation is the secondary aspect of Marriage. Always invoke the presence of the Most Holy Trinity in your Marriage”, he sermonized. The Priest urged the people, especially the In-Laws to pray for the couple instead judging or castigating them with unnecessary information that will help build their home.

The Priests present are : Very.Rev.Fr.Dr.Joseph Kabari, Rev.Fr.Barr.Michael Akere, Rev Fr.Boniface Gbaamamuu and Rev.Fr.Innocent Johnsantus with The Sponsors Sir and Lady Hycienth Nwabueze with the Couple.

Present at the Wedding were: Rev. Fr. Dr. Joseph Kabari, Rev. Fr. Barr. Michael Akere, Rev. Fr. Boniface Gbaamamuu and Rev. Fr. Innocent Johnsantus. The couple thanked God for the grace to come together and prayed for more grace to live together in love. They appreciated their families, friends and well wishers for their time, support and prayers and asked God to bless them.

Couple with Children and Staff of De Marrilac Centre- Home of Street Children.
Couple with Students of Government Comprehensive Secondary School (GCSS)
Mr. Smith Nwokocha and Mr. Smart Nwokocha-Twin Brother (Best Man)
Just The Bride
The Groom Alone
Couple with Peace Corps of Nigeria.
Couple with Men On Suit
Couple with Family Members
Couple with Friends and Well wishers
Couples toast


Janet Brown, Tunde Fashola, SAN and Segun Adeniyi for EiE Nigeria’s 12th Anniversary Symposium

‘‘We must begin to imbibe a culture by which those who aspire to lead our people are subjected to a rigorous process of public debates that will assess their suitability on objective criteria, rather than the religion they practice or where they come from.’’

– Olusegun Adeniyi

(Chairman, ThisDay Editorial Board)  

Enough is Enough (EiE) Nigeria will host a symposium titled ‘On Debates and Democracy’ on Tuesday, April 5, 2022 at 10am at the Yar’Adua Centre in Abuja to commemorate its 12th anniversary. The focus of the conversation is to explore how political debates contribute to democracy via citizens’ engagement; the necessity of a legal requirement; the role of the media and the role of political parties.

The symposium will feature a keynote address by Janet Brown, the Executive Director of the Commission on Presidential Debates (CPD), the body that hosts all presidential debates in the US. In her capacity as the Executive Director of CPD, our keynote speaker, Janet Brown, has directed the organisation of 33 presidential and vice presidential debates, and provided technical support to debate groups in over 40 countries.

The event will also feature a media panel with different debate moderators – Maupe Ogun-Yusuf, Ngozi Alaegbu, Reuben Abati, Seun Okinbaloye, and Mac Imoni Amarere – in conversation with Segun Adeniyi; and a debate panel with Babatunde Fashola, Federal Minister of Works & Housing and former Lagos State governor; Mercy Tosin Ayodele, 2018 Osun governorship election candidate; Eddie Emessiri, Executive Secretary, Nigerian Election Debate Group (NEDG), and ‘Yemi Adamolekun, Executive Director, Enough is Enough Nigeria (EiE).

Mr Fashola’s role is particularly important as it is a classic case study of the power of debates. He’s the “most debated” politician in Nigeria’s history, going from an ‘unknown’ chief of staff to a candidate to be reckoned with, the more he participated in debates.

Register on, and join us in-person or online TOMORROW!


Enough is Enough Nigeria ( is a network of individuals and organisations committed to instituting a culture of good governance and public accountability in Nigeria through active citizenship. EiE’s #RSVPRegister | Select | Vote | Protect is Nigeria’s longest running get-out-the vote campaign. EiE was an integral part of the #OccupyNigeria movement in 2012 and continues to drive the #OpenNASS and #OfficeOftheCitizen campaigns.


By Smith Nwokocha

+234 (0) 708 778 4788

February 15, 2022
Lagos, Nigeria

For Immediate Release

2023 Elections: EiE Nigeria Rolls Out #MakeNaijaWork Campaign

“Votes don’t count, if there are no votes to count.”
― Demilade Roberts
(Photographer & Active Citizen)

Foremost good governance and civic advocacy organisation, EiE Nigeria, has officially flagged off its 2022-2023 elections campaign.

Under the aegis of the group’s flagship initiative #RSVP – Register | Select | Vote-not-fight | Protect, the multilayered campaign kicked off on February 2, 2022, with a series of media engagements, including a Twitter Spaces conversation.

Themed, #MakeNaijaWork, the 13-month campaign is a clarion call to Nigerians to seize the golden opportunity to decide and elect credible leaders by registering to vote and selecting candidates based on defined criteria – courage, compassion, competence, capacity & character.

Speaking on the core objective of the campaign, the organisation’s Executive Director, ‘Yemi Adamolekun stated: “We spend so much time asking why we are yet to make socio-political progress but the answer is clear: We are yet to strategically occupy our Office of the Citizen. We are yet to understand that this is the highest office in Nigeria because elected and appointed public servants serve us. They are called public servants for a reason – to serve the public! Elections provide an opportunity to determine our servants!

Launched in the month of love, #MakeNaijaWork asks that we show love to our country by engaging in the process to make her work for the benefit of all. If we love Nigeria, we should do all that we can to make her work, which includes registering to vote, voting wisely and holding our public servants accountable!

God bless the Federal Republic of Nigeria! ###

Enough is Enough Nigeria ( is a network of individuals and organisations committed to instituting a culture of good governance and public accountability in Nigeria through active citizenship. EiE’s #RSVP – Register | Select | Vote | Protect is a key voter education campaign. EiE was an integral part of the #OccupyNigeria movement in 2012 and is very active in the #OpenNASS and #OfficeOftheCitizen campaigns.


By Smith Nwokocha





  1. Ensure they provide the Public with Police activities.
  2. Bridge the gap between the Police and the Public.
  3. Connect People with Authorities and help them avoid Police brutality.
  4. Teaches the right ways to approach security agencies.

The Initiative started since 2014 with: “Police is Your Friend with Bosinde”.

Amb. Bosinde Araikpe sensitizing the audience on Police activities

There is what is called: a) Panel Code (Practiced in the North) and b) Criminal Code (Practiced in the South). These Panel Codes are the beginning of Police brutality in Nigeria, mostly in the South.

Panel Code: The Public/People decides and report to the Police to enforce and this is the practice in Northern Nigeria.

Criminal Code: Gives the Police the right to enforce the law without the consent of the people/public and this practice is common in Southern Nigeria.

Audience in Attendance

We should also note that, the Police are Civil Servants; They are different from the Military.
The presence of the Civilian Joint Task Force was acknowledged for the great work they are doing in the state, though their presence is more in the North. The Illegal Refineries destructions in some part of Rivers State is done by the Civilian J-T-F, even if they are not given the credit most times. The Civilian J-T-F was led by the National Commander,South South Adah Nwachukwu with his entourage. The Nigerian Peace Corp, Rivers State Command, was represented by the State Commandant- Dr. Obiora Michael with his entourage. Finally, the Commissioner of Police, Rivers State was represented by SP. Ojo Lawrence, who engaged the audience on the relationship of the Police and the Communities. It was well attended and an awesome experience.

The Activities of SECURITY BRIDGE WITH BOSINDE can be followed on Facebook and Instagram @bosindelive


Nigerian police
Bosinde Araikpe
@Bosinde Araikpe Global Peace Initiative


By Smith Nwokocha



What are your expectations for Marriage?
Communication is so key. Spell out your expectations. How do you express yourself when you are sad, angry? Learn your partner. Do you support or leave him/her alone when he/she is angry?

  1. Understand each other’s Love language; It helps in communication.

Types of Love Language:
a) Access to Service
b) Quality Attention
c) Words of Affirmation
d) Gifts
e) Physical Touch
Ask for Accountability Partner, before getting married. Ask questions. Your tone matters. Your language? Learn Communication Skills; Learn your partner. Your bed actions.

  1. Fighting Fair; Don’t burst into tears, when you are in an argument or fight with your partner. Don’t bring past relationship into your conversation. Have an honest conversation. Don’t use the following phrases:
    a) You always
    b) You never
    The above phrases, communicate hopelessness. Picking your battles, like every argument is a war; I must win every argument, don’t make everything about YOU.

Men get creatives, when there is no pressure. Men are never going to be MIND-READERS! So, Communicate.

MEN’S GREATEST NEED IS “HONOUR”, NOT SEX. If you are being disrespectful to him, you will not get the best of him. Men love team work, friendship and communication on a very calm mood. He will not receive it, if you disrespect him. Confrontation tone does not work with men, friendship tone, honour tone makes it.

Your husband’s mother and you are parallel line; they don’t meet anywhere. So, give the mother the much respect and know you are not in competition with her.

Pray for your Spouse/Marriage daily.
Master Forgiveness constantly, in fact, master the act of not being offended. Freda Idahosa-Ajayi (Mrs).


Your Emotional Masseur
Freda Idahosa-Ajayi


By Smith Nwokocha

11th February, 2022



After a Worship and Music Interlude; The Host, Dr. Stephanie Oarhe, said; “If you have a transformed mind, you will succeed in Marriage”.

Cheating is simply getting emotionally and physically attached to someone else. Pst. Wisdom Osiri.

a) Cyber-Cheating: Cheating Online. Dating Online, outside your Marriage. Phones are supposed to help us socialized, but now we extend our Socialization outside boundaries; Phones today, facilitate cheating, instead of helping us unite, it begins to separate us.
b) Emotional Affair: Infidelity, for example in the workplace; you move away from professional to personal relationship. What it does, is that, it causes temporary disconnection and then, you see yourself taking emotional attachment to someone else.

Dr. Stephanie Oarhe and Pst. Osiri Wisdom (PhD)


  1. When your spouse begins to hide his/her phone(s).
  2. Change in physical look/appearance. Just know there is a chasing going on and then, the victim will begin to feel emotional distance/disconnect.
  3. When your spouse reduce intimacy.
  4. The moment your spouse becomes unusually busy/unnecessarily busy.
  5. Your spouse is no longer willing to work on the relationship, he/she becomes more secretive.
  6. Your spouse becomes more defensive.
  7. More excessively attached to appearance.
  9. Social Media changes, including change of password.
  10. Your spouse spending pattern changes
    The moment you are connected to somebody else, you have to disconnect, to re-connect to another.


  1. Pray
  2. Privacy: “Cheating is a thing of the MIND”. There is something deeper that has to be done, to correct the wrong. A Cheat has been cheating long ago, before even getting married and its like habit that feeds the neuron.
    Two things motivate Man, the way God created us; PAIN and PLEASURE.
    “Human beings we are creatures of habits”.
    In our subconscious, it takes a process to come out of ugly habits. But, the word of God has the capacity to change us. The word is perfect, it can convert the soul.
Pst Wisdom Osiri and Mrs. Favour Osiri

How To Cut Off Emotional Attachment from your EX; There are some EXs that are DESTRUCTIVE, while, there are some people you are supposed to marry and you eventually didn’t marry such persons; they are not bad influence.
Look at Cheating in two ways:
a) Destructive
b) Discovery path
If that your EX was that GOOD, you should have married that EX. Start over and build a life with your spouse. The EX-thing has to end. The comparison with your EX has to end, if there is anything wrong, talk to your spouse.
SELFISHNESS; Once a need is not met, someone will begin to remember past, pointing to EX.
Phone Communication is key. There is a new language, which is “Love me the way I want”. But this new language keeps changing. There is a sacrifice part to Relationship. We need to train ourselves to get things right. Build Affection and Communication.
Expose yourself to the right influence and positive influence.
Seek Counsel.
How you respond, is your own responsibility.
You can’t change people; you have to be the change you exalt.
Cheating on its own, have effects; Psychological torture in your mind.

Pst. Chris Oarhe and Dr. Stephanie Oarhe

ADULTERY: “Once there is INFIDELITY, that Marriage is dead”. You have to re-marry your spouse to start-up.
Women are emotional/relational.
There is a cultural-birth, that Men cheat more than women. These days, the trend has changed, because women are rising in self-awareness. Women are advancing in different areas.
Statistics has shown that, most first-child/children are not usually from the Man/husband; It’s either the child is from the EX of the woman.

It is wrong, looking at a father. You wouldn’t want that for your daughter. Feed your mind on better things. “YOU SHOULD NOT BUILD YOUR JOY ON ANOTHER PERSON’S PAIN”.
“KEEP THE WORD OF GOD IN FOCUS”.. Dr. Stephanie Oarhe.
Stephanie Oarhe (Dr). Osiri Wisdom (Dr).

heart2heart #heart2heartconference2022

Port Harcourt Wakawaka


The Last Woman Standing!
(Chidimma Okeibe)

By Smith Nwokocha
Just some few questions for you Champion.

Question 1. How did you start the journey of Ultimate Guilder Search?
Answer 1: My journey to GUS started when I saw the advert on my Facebook. I started applying immediately because I didn’t want to take any chance as I’ve been waiting for the opportunity. I went through the rigorous regional selection and the final screening at Lagos. Long story cut short, I succeeded in all of these and made it into the jungle.

Question 2. Becoming the Last Woman Standing, how does it make you feel?
Answer 2: It feels good being the Last Woman Standing but not fulfilled as that wasn’t my target.

Question 3. You are obviously a Role Model to a lot young people, what project(s) do you intend to embark on?
Answer 3: I intend to embark on projects that encourage legit empowerment but my area of interest is that of Women Empowerment and Girl Child Education.

Chidimma Okeibe at the Adventure

Question 4. As a promoter of Girl Power, what you do think of the Child Right Act and what plans do you have to promote Self awareness and discovery amongst Girl Child?
Answer 4: The Girl Right Act is a law that should not be found wanting in the constitution of any country. Female discrimination and marginalisation should be discouraged at all cost because being a female is not a disability.
I intend to work with NGOs that promote women empowerment and girl child education. In the long run, I’ll establish a foundation that will promote self discovery and confidence amongst the female gender.

Question 5. Can you tell us a bit about your background, family and future plans?
Answer 5: I come from a family of six (three siblings and my parents) and I’m the LASTBORN. Things were tough for us while growing up but we conquered with love and support from one another.
I had my primary school education at my home town in Imo State. My secondary school was in Onitsha.
I studied Public Administration and Local Government at University of Nigeria Nsukka.
I plan furthering my studies in Human Resources Management. I’m also planning to go into acting while running a business and most importantly, establishing a foundation for girl child education and women empowerment.
Thank you for having me here!

We Thank you for your time and may God Almighty help you fulfill your Purpose as you keep adding value, remain Exceptional!

The Champ-The Last Woman Standing-
(Chidimma Okeibe)